5 steps to sustained personal change
I’ve been using this concept of a “crucible” or intense life event as a backdrop lately for some of my posts. Today, I’d like to talk a little about something that has been an element of my current crucible, and what I have learned from it.
The topic is change, specifically personal change. Even more specifically, addressing the question of not simply how to change, but whether we can change, especially aspects of ourselves that are part of “who we are” and we would consider central to our personality makeup.
I’m not sure I can answer any of those questions yet. Change is a complex, complicated process and my experiences over the last year have shown me that while fundamental personal change is possible, it’s making the change permanent that is the real challenge.
In this post I’ll talk about the 5 steps I identified as essential to any attempt at sustained personal change. I’ll end the post with a few quick thoughts I’ve taken away recently from my “crucible”.
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Your morning routine, interrupted
When you wake up in the morning do you have a smile on your face and a sense of happy anticipation for the day you are about to enter into? Or do you wake to “just another day”, or worse a sense of dread or depression?
If you fall into the second camp, ask yourself the following questions. You can ask them in your head on the way to work, so no one will hear you. I just ask one thing - just this once, be absolutely brutally honest with yourself.
Ready?
- Why am I not excited at the prospect of a new day?
- What would have to change for me to waken with a smile on my face?
- What’s the worst that could happen if I made that change?
- Now the Zinger: which is worse - how you feel each morning or making that tough change?
These don’t have to be huge life issues we’re talking about here. It could just be you’re bored at work, regret not apologizing to someone for some harsh words, or haven’t come to terms with getting a bit older. Whatever it is, confront it, figure out what it would take to move past it, then decide which is worse.
Either way, accept it and move on. Life’s too short.